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Plagiarism Of Personality
We’re ignoring our uniqueness.
Disclaimer: Everything written below is the writer’s thoughts and observation-based curations.
Don’t you think it’s a race? Race of being the best by being- different, unique, weird, crazy, abnormal, spooky, and some more words to describe the latest trend in the market? How often do we see stories of a romantic pair, where the guy tells the girl or vice-versa, “I like you because you’re different”! Only they realize later, that they’re all the same!! They think their partner is different is because they pretend to be at the beginning of the relationship. I am not saying they can’t be different, but the odds seem quite not-in-favor of the notion! For instance, take all of us. The Medium Writers. Aren’t we all trying to stand-out? Trying to write the most different & the next cool article that is loved by everyone? Why do you think I am writing this cool & different post? Let’s face it guys, our purpose in life is love. To love others, yes. But mostly to be loved by others. We live for validation & crave it in everything we do. Henceforth, the race to be cool & different begins!
But why do we ignore the fact that we are different !?
Plagiarism of Personality:
What am I getting at? At a point, that in being different & cool, we’re losing the touch! The touch of reality.
Being Yourself is a luxury only a few can afford. In between all the haze of ‘getting noticed’, all of us are losing the one thing we must always hold on to! Being Ourselves. The problem with today’s mindset is not that we’re hustling over ‘plagiarism of personalities’, but not being aware of it! As individuals, we have individual personalities (everyone knows that), yet we’re unknowingly competing with ourselves & not with others.
“Plagiarism of Personality can be defined as a person who, despite being sufficient on their own, thinks otherwise & tries to adopt practices that are considered to be ‘cooler’ & have been adapted by several beings, to get the attention of the people who’re suffering from the same, unknowingly.”
We all are different and that is the most basic similarity amongst us.
Weird Is The New Cool!
Everyone NOW thinks/knows that weird is the new cool. Hence, everyone is trying to be weird in their ways. Even if it means to lose yourself! If you’re naturally NOT weird, you’re still cool because at least You are Yourself! Trust me, Weird isn’t the new Cool! Being Yourself is.
Yet, this is not easily understandable if you’ve gone too far! Then let me make it easier:
There are weird people. They’re cool.
Some people aren’t weird, but they’re still cool.
Why do we want to copy other’s personalities to be as cool as them?
Why can’t we accept that dude, we’re in fact, cooler than thou!
Weird isn’t the new Cool! Being Yourself is.
Still, you can deny that you’re suffering from plagiarism of personality. It’s okay. Because we’re all weird. We all are different and that is the most basic similarity amongst us. Yet, we can’t run away from the truth, which is, we’re all struggling to win over the other. But the good thing is, we still love each other & support each other in every way possible.
To make it easier, I am going to share some signs & solutions, if the plagiarism of personality has taken a toll on you.
Signs of Plagiarism of Personality:
- Denial & Unawareness.
- Constant thoughts on how to ‘prove yourself’.
- Thoughts like ‘They did this. How can I do that to be better’ are also common.
- Trying to be different.
- Seeking validation.
- Low self-esteem.
- Hard time making friends by setting higher standards for yourself.
- Not feeling happy from the inside.
- This list can be very long, but I’ll leave at it.
Solutions for Plagiarism Of Personality:
- Be aware & accept the truth.
- Work hard on originality and the results will show.
- Get inspired by others. Not envied.
- Embrace your different.
- Stop giving a damn about what people think.
- Be yourself. Accept you as you. Your confidence is the best thing to carry.
- Be grateful for your true friends. Value their presence in your life.
- Spend time with yourself. Love Yourself. You’ll be happier.
The point to remember is — You are YOU. There can never be another YOU. Don’t pollute that with plagiarism of personality! Embrace Yourself. We’re different and that’s why we’re cool.
Thanks for reading. Namaste.
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The Truth About Unrequited Love
Words from the Archive.
To all of you wondering what unrequited love means, Unrequited Love is that one-sided love story that you never got to start or finish!
I recently read an article about Unrequited Love and it really seemed very relatable and pure! That made me wonder, is it real or just momentary, or what really is the psychology behind unrequited love? So, I looked inside my own head and heart and here you’ll know some factual basis for having a heart-wrenching one-sided love affair!
First things first, when do you know that your crush or infatuation phase is over and now you have the one-sided love for a person?
Well, psychology says that it takes 4 months to fall in love, and crush & infatuation happen all the time, but there’s a silver lining between all these. Crushs may also remain for a long time depending on the person you’re crushing on! If the person is reciprocating the same amount of effort, you’ll crush over them even more! But then you’ll get to know them, and you’ll feel like “I don’t like this person anymore, it was better before when I knew nothing about them”!!! And your crush is over. Time for a new hunt.
Happens with me! *giggles*
Infatuation is slightly different because after the equal effort of the person you still like them, and you may feel like you can be with them and all that stuff. Day dreaming is a common disease around this (it’s common in every attraction though, planning the future and imagining, what it’ll be like to be their gf/bf)….*too much dopamine*. It has more passion, more evaluation and more regrets of doing crazy things! *Sighs*
But then someone better comes along, and there’s a wall that’s slowly building up, and the next thing you know, you have a new crush!
Love is another level of submission to the person who loves us back. You know things about them, they know things about you. You see someone better , but in your heart you both know that this person is the only one who makes me happy. (Love is selfish in nature by the way). And you know all the other things that happen when two people are in love!!! *Eye rolling*.
Now, the hard one is the Unrequited Love.
I am sure most of us have had or still have a one-sided love for a person, who knows nothing about it!
This love is completely unconditional and selfless. We know the person and their traits, and we love everything about them, without any doubts about the fact that they may never feel the same for us! But, deep down, we still hope that someday they’ll reciprocate equally.
There’s one edge though. We don’t see the negative side of that person, or any deal breakers. We tend to focus on all the good things the person has and neglect their imperfections. That is why we find it hard to get out of these feelings. I am not saying that a person’s imperfections are a bad thing, infact they make them more real and more human. But, when we deny that a person can have any spots, we are telling our brain to see them as PERFECT , for US!
Although this is stupid, but everything is fair in love! We all do it.
Why do we feel this way?
When we see a person as PERFECT, we see all those things that we would want in our ideal partner to have! Of course, we don’t know who that’ll turn out to be, ideal or not. But, the person we have an unrequited love for, is that ideal partner for us! In simpler words, they just make us feel like home.
This is the only reason I feel there is, to have an undenying, undying, unconditional unrequited love.
Now, the real question is,
Can we get out of this hopeless love?
Well, it isn’t easy to get out of LOVE! Especially, when we have these feelings for a long time, months, or years may be! But, yes it is possible.
We just need to tell ourselves the real facts about this situation. The truth about Unrequited Love is that, its not in our hands to make someone fall in love with us. We can’t make anyone feel anything. So, we must accept the truth that these feelings, if grown stronger each day, will only harm US. To get out of them is to focus on the fact that THAT person may know about your feelings (because they do, it is obvious to guess if someone likes you), they still don’t do anything about it, and you are just waiting there for them to initiate, but trust me, they won’t.
Now, you can move on by accepting the fact that they know this, but still don’t feel the same way, and you can stop wasting your life hoping, they ever will! I know it’s hard , and it hurts.
But, do yourself a favour today. Get out of it. Because there’re plenty of fishes in the sea who will value you for YOU.
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Writing Everyday Is NOT Going To Help You
Don’t Write Everyday. Write Regularly Instead. There’s a difference!
I can’t remember what was the first thing I ever wrote, but I know it wasn’t good. Surely, it had grammatical errors, it mustn’t have connected with the reader and it definitely was one of the worst things one could read! But I do remember WHEN I wrote it. 2010. I didn’t know I could write. All I used to do was journal. The old teenage rant over betrayal in friendships, having crushes & puberty! It was a regular journal, amidst some poems! Unfortunately, I remember the poems!!! Yuck!!! You would kill yourself if you’d read them! Don’t worry, I wouldn’t let you. Now, ten years later, I know I can write better than I used to. But the reason for that isn’t the gap of ten years, it’s that I never stopped writing! It was unintentional, but it was my love for writing that kept me going all these years.
Yet, I wrote regularly. Not everyday. Being a teenager, you can understand I must’ve had some other businesses to attend. Besides, writing was my hobby at that time! Now, that it’s the way of life for me, I still feel, writing everyday isn’t the thing I like doing!!
Difference between Writing Regularly & Writing Everyday
Writing everyday, is simply writing everyday.
Write. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.
However, writing regularly is writing when you HAVE it-The idea +Intention.
Wake up. Read. Write only when you have something valuable to write. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.
Moreover, writing everyday is easy & anyone can do it, but as the years have passed, I have learnt that writing regularly is more difficult & necessary.
Keep reading while I describe it in bits.
Pros & Cons of Writing Everyday:
I am sure, all you’ve heard so far, are the pros of writing everyday. The experts tell us to write, at least 1000 words and more each day! But I am not an expert. I won’t tell you anything like that. I will tell you — by experience, the truth about writing everyday, which also includes cons.
Pros:
- It forms a great habit.
- It makes your writing technique better, one day at a time.
- It’s good for traffic.
- It’s good to gain followers.
- It helps with the brain exercise.
- It makes you wiser & more informed.
- This list can go on based on personal experiences. Add yours if you want!
Cons:
- It can feel exhausting.
- It makes us feel stressed & guilty to skip a day.
- It can cause writer’s block.
- It can also cause creativity block.
- It can distract you from other important tasks at hand.
- It can cause anxiety.
- This list too, can go on based on personal experiences.
I understand writing everyday is a habit, a routine or should I say — a sentiment for most of the writers. Even Seth Godin has been writing everyday since forever. No wonder he crossed 7000 posts on his blog in 2017!!!
What I am trying to say is, this is legendary & inspiring but NOT EVERYONE CAN DO IT. Why put so much pressure on them already!!! This charm of writing everyday is best in a state of flow.
Can we achieve our goals & remain in the state of flow by writing regularly & not everyday?
Yes, we can.
Writing Regularly can be defined as the writing flow where the writer, instead of writing everyday, makes a schedule to take necessary gaps within the flow state to work on something else.
In simpler words, for example: If you’re writing a book & you plan to self publish it, because why not?! There are other things to be taken care of rather than the words itself. The design, the cover, the fonts, the pages, the chapters etc. If we write regularly, say once in two days and take one of those days in working on other parts of the book, it is still you working on the book! It keeps the fun on, because writing too much can take a toll on you and dividing tasks within the group keeps you creative & relaxed. Sometimes, while doing something else, you get more & better ideas for the writing you’re currently doing & you can add them up the next day or the day when you write again!
Note: This is only an example of writing a book. The practice can include any other form of art.
Pros & Cons of Writing Regularly:
Yes, there are pros & cons for this as well. But how different are they from writing everyday?
Let’s find out!
Pros:
- It forms a great habit — Researching
- It makes our writing techniques better, because we learn to edit the things we have written already.
- It’s good for your post to gain more readers before you bombard them with more!
- It keeps your writing game UP which provides quality in everything you write. Hence, genuine followers.
- It helps with your creativity to wander more to improve the piece you’re writing. More ideas, more words!
- It makes you calm & blimey with all the ideas you’re getting for your next piece — because you had time to think & read.
- This list can go on based on personal experiences. Add yours if you feel the same.
Cons:
I am sorry. Since, I am writing this, I am obviously biased towards writing regularly rather than everyday! So, I don’t see any cons! However, you may find this post cynical, misleading & alarming. If you write everyday, good for you & if you encourage others to do the same, great. Yet, like I said, Not everyone will agree with either you or myself!
Honestly, I have tried writing everyday but it didn’t work for me. It makes me feel all the cons I mentioned above and so, I wrote this. After all, I feel, we must all work at our own pace. Whether to practice our art everyday or not, is our own individual choice.
So, make a choice that’s best for you. Thanks for reading. Namaste.
Taruni Sharma is a content creator in the entertainment field. She is a writer & being interested in human psychology & life’s philosophy (& because of being too emotional), she loves writing poetry & prose about love, life, self & personal development. Stay in touch by following her Blog, Instagram, Twitter, Spotify Podcast, Linkedin, Youtube & Quora.
This is such an insightful perspective. It’s true—no matter how much we engage with others, our minds are constantly processing,…
Congratulations!! 🌻🌟☀️
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Thank you so much. Glad you could connect to it♥️
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Indeed! Thank you.